A Special Father’s Day Tribute – In Loving Memory of My Father, the Late Rev. George E. Butler, I
This Father’s Day, Sunday – June 16, 2019, I would like to honor my Dad, the Late Rev. George E Butler I, with a special memory tribute. This is going to be somewhat transparent but I need to get this out. It is one of the most pleasant memories I have of my father. Although it happened sometime ago, it still blesses me to this day. I was privileged to deliver my Dad’s eulogy at his homegoing, Jan. 5, 2005 – he went to be with the Lord on Dec. 31, 2004. The eulogy was entitled, “The Things Only A Father Can Fix”. This tribute is going to show you one of those ways. In spite of his transition having happened almost 14 years ago, I still miss him immensely. But, he blessed me with a legacy that makes his absence tolerable. The Heavenly Father’s love, grace and care makes it bearable. And every now and then, instances like these makes it comfortingly palpable. Walk with me for a few minutes as I share this memory with you of my Dad…
It was the month of July, 1994. I was 31 years old. My wife, Patricia K Butler, had given birth to our third daughter, Kimm Butler, who was just three months old. The older two daughters were Qiana BKey and Adara Sherron; Darren Butler Jr. was not in the picture yet. I went to work (It was a Tuesday) at my job as a Field Sales Representative for a family-owned business that provided and serviced personal pagers (beepers). As I was winding down the day, the Sales Director called me into the office and solemnly informed me she had unfortunate news. The industry was shifting (mobile phones were beginning to revolutionize the personal communications industry and pagers were quickly becoming obsolete) and the owner could no longer carry my position profitably. He instructed her to inform me my services would no longer be needed, effective THAT DAY. She tried to intervene, exclaiming to him that he couldn’t do that just like that because I had a family at home, including a new born. His response was, “well make it effective TOMORROW.” She called me in and delivered the news to me apologetically and with extreme discomfort, apologizing for the owner’s behavior. I responded I understood and thanked her for being great and wished her well walking out of the office and the building. I maintained a very good exterior but inwardly I was going to pieces. I had so many questions about what I was going to do. How was I going to take care of my family? What would be my next move? One of the most pressing dilemmas was an obligation the following month. My oldest brother Kevin (Carmen Butler) was getting married in Lake Tahoe, California and I had consented to be his best man. My father and I were scheduled to fly to California together for the wedding. I was now greatly bewildered because I deemed it impossible to get to California the following month under these circumstances. I did not want to disappoint my brother, and I did not want to face the embarrassment of calling my father and telling him I couldn’t come. So dejectedly, I asked God, ‘what am I going to do?” Rather pointedly He said, ‘you’re going to call your father and tell him exactly what happened.” (There’s a message for us in there – CALL THE FATHER IN HEAVEN AND TELL HIM EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED!) With skeptical and defeated resolve, I did exactly what God told me to do. I called my father and told him what happened and that it would make it impossible for me to go to California. My father’s response was just astonishing. To this day, I still try to wrap my head around it. He simply said, “Son, can you get to the airport next month?” I was shocked and dumbfounded wondering did he hear what I said. I somewhat stumbled but managed to say yes, not even knowing how I was going to do that. He said, “Ok meet me at the airport – I’ll take care of everything. (Each time I retell this, it bring tears to my eyes, especially now that he’s not here) I got to the airport not knowing what to expect. You see we had only repaired our relationship 3 years prior. So I had no reference point of this aspect of him as a father. My father did exactly what he said he was going to do – HE. TOOK. CARE. OF. EVERYTHING. The flight was paid for. We roomed together. I ate whatever I wanted. He even made me get some souvenirs for myself at gift shops. He paid for the tuxedo rental. HE. TOOK. CARE. OF. EVERYTHING. My brother got married to his wonderful bride, my sister-in-love. The trip was great. My father and I had the chance to do some serious bonding. I found out that some skin challenges I was having were hereditary because he had them too. The trip was wonderful. I forgot about the trouble I left behind. (THAT’S WHAT BEING IN THE HEAVENLY FATHER’S PRESENCE DOES – YOU FORGET ABOUT YOUR TROUBLES!) I had a great time with my brother. But, all things must come to an end. The wedding was over, they left for their honeymoon, and we made preparations to go back to New York. The flight home was great. Then we landed, I began to remember where I had left off with my job trouble. Before it could really settle in, we got our bags and prepared to go our separate ways. I prepared to bid my father farewell. As I did so, he looked at me and said “Son, don’t worry about anything, everything is going to be alright.” As he did so he extended his hand and placed a wad of bills in my hands. He then said, “Now go home and take care of your family.” I was so surprised but I thanked him and promised him I would. When I got into my transportation to come home (I can’t remember how I got home or who took me there), I pulled the money out of my pocket and it was a sizable sum. I will never forget what my father did as long as I live. He erased the sting and the fear of the situation. I did what he said. I’m still trying to do what he said. I don’t even remember how long it took to get another job. I just know my father’s words and actions to the whole thing was incredibly pivotal to helping me navigate that experience to the point where now I simply remember coming out of it. I remember him saying throughout the trip, ‘just lean on your father.’. (THERE’S ANOTHER MESSAGE IN THERE – FOR THOSE OF US GOING THROUGH DIFFICULT SEASONS AND TRANSITIONS, JUST LEAN ON THE HEAVENLY FATHER!). Now almost 25 years removed from the experience, I still remember it vividly and it blesses me immensely.
To those of us who are fathers, we must remember OUR CHILDREN WILL ALWAYS NEED US. We have to do everything we can to be there for them, even when they are at stages and phases of life, especially as adults, where ‘WE ARE NOT FEELIN’ THEM.’ Thank you Pop so much. That was one of the critical fixes I got from you that still ministers to me to this day. I pray I can be half as good to my children. I salute you this Father’s Day – 2019!
With Much Love,
Darren Ellis
Something Good To Talk About! 